Looking normal terrifies me. I hate it.
I can't help but wonder why though. Is it some shallow thought of mine, that I can barely stand the hint of normalcy in my body? Why does it disgust me so much? This feeling and belief doesn't extend beyond me, I only apply it to myself. Other people look lovely at a normal weight. But why not me? The sad part is I'm not even a normal weight, yet I've convinced myself I look like it- twenty pounds of imaginary flesh and fat.
I don't have an answer, though I wish I knew it. All I know is this feeling leaves me feeling sad, depressed, disgusting, and shallow.